“How did you do it?”

People often ask me, “How did you do it?” when they find out I took seven trips to India between 1985 and 1997 to study meditation with the meditation masters of the Himalayas. In the same sense, the question “How did you do it?” comes up about my writing and self-publishing a book that has led to an online teaching program reaching a potential audience of 60,000 students. And people have asked me, “How did you do it?” regarding several successful businesses I have owned. Answering that question leads to some fascinating stories but it doesn’t help anyone to figure out, “How can I do what I want to do?” That’s often the question under the question.

To get that answer, you might ask a different question: “Who do I have to be to do it?” What has helped me to “do it” is being really clear about what “doing it” means to me – how I want to show up, how I want to be vs. what I have to do. Here is what has worked for me in committing to go to India, writing and publishing my book, and in running my businesses… I had to be 100%.

How can you be 100% in your life? Try on these five steps*

The Five Steps to being 100%

1. Develop Clarity
Decide what you really, really, really want. Frame it as what is meaningful to you vs. just a goal. For instance, saying “I want to lose weight” is different from saying “I want to be healthy and feel confident and alive.” When you make what you want bigger than a goal it’s easier to stick with it and be 100%.

2. Change Your Thinking
Imagine that you can stand behind yourself and observe what you are thinking. Ask yourself: Is that thought helpful? Does it make me feel energized? Is it moving me toward what I want? Sometimes we get so caught in being the “thinker” we forget we have the power to change and direct our thinking! The one who is watching the thoughts is always 100%.

3. Take Action Daily
Take at least one step daily in the direction of what you want. It can be a very small step or a big step. No matter which, when you go to sleep at night you can say to yourself, “I was intentional today.” Being intentional daily is showing up 100%.

4. Evolutionary Step
Declaring your intentions strengthen them. Evolution is about how we are in our environment – how we shape our environment and how our environment shapes us. Letting others know what you are up to invites more resources into your life. When you are evolutionary, the environment serves you 100%.

5. Transcend
Lighten up! You may have heard of the story of the child who put his hand in a jar of cookies and wouldn’t let any of them go even though he couldn’t get his hand back out of the jar. When you come to life with an open hand, letting go of shoulds, expectations and attachment, your actions will be life-supporting and you will be able to receive life’s gifts.

Whatever you do, the truth is that you are already in your life 100%.

*The five steps are adapted from Walk on Water: How to Make Change Easier, © Lea Belair (2005).

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May 16th, 2008

Thriving in change seminar

Lea speaking on Thriving in Change Now that you’re getting comfortable coping with change, get ready to thrive in change. Lea recently spoke to coaches at the second annual New England Regional International Coach Federation conference, getting audiences to their feet - making experiments in thriving with change. To learn how to do it check out the article in the next post!